The Man’s Guide to Women By John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Douglas Abrams – Notes

The Man's Guide to Women

Table of Contents

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The Man's Guide to Women By John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Douglas Abrams - Notes

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The Man's Guide to Women By John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Douglas Abrams - Notes

Deepak Shukla’s Notes On The Man’s Guide to Women By John Gottman, Julie Schwartz Gottman, Douglas Abrams – Notes:

Hey guys,

I finished reading this book on the 10th January 2021.

Here’s a synopsis of the book I grabbed from Amazon:

“A great “philosopher” once said, “Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color nine.” But the fact is, men can understand women to their great benefit. All they need is the right teacher. And, arguably, there is no better teacher than John Gottman, PhD, a world-renowned relationships researcher and author of the best-selling 7 Principles of Making Marriage Work.”

And here are my actual notes I took whilst I was listening to this on Audible:

  • 3 powerful questions to ask

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  1. What do you need?
  2. What are you concerned about?
  3. What are you feeling?
  • Taking a break 2nd strategy
  • Breathing and count to 10 self soothing for reducing flooding
  • Diffuse physiological arousal also a problem for men (DPA)
  • Emotional flooding is problem for men
  • Criticism, defensiveness, contempt or stonewalling
  • Have to reduce heartrate in a conflict
  • Cause of women’s anger
  1. Powerlessness.
  2. Injustice and
  3. the irresponsibility of others
  • Long before get into bed can create anticipation of possibility
  • Physical touch should be just as varied as stimulating conversation
  • Most boring men have set routine
  1. Step 1: Kiss the lips
  2. Step 2: Touch the breasts
  3. Step 3: Touch the clitoris
  4. Step 4: Insert the penis
  • Sensual touch is often light and sensitive
  • When women bares her neck it’s a major sign of interest
  • Kissing neck and nape of neck particularly intimate
  • Lips and tongue important with kissing her all over
  • Creating novelty (it’s different very often) is important
  • Men like wetter kisses than women do
  • Few things more intense than gazing into a women’s eyes
  • Her voluptuous soul
  • Stroke a women until she’s ready or one of you will get hurt
  • Women has various spots. G spot A spot U spot
  • She needs to feel emotionally and physically safe and connected with you in order to feel aroused and experience pleasure
  • Women’s mind is her most powerful erogoneous zone
  • There is not a single part of a women’s body that is not an erogenous zone if touched in the right way
  • Take the time to find out what feels good to her and what gives her pleasure
  • A hero in the bedroom knows this his pleasure comes from her pleasure
  • To truly make love to a woman you have to make love to her whole body